Lately I am spending a lot of time around youth sports;
my youngest is playing for her 3rd grade team and I am trying to
establish our ministry in a new location… And as usual I find myself in many of
the same discussions I have been in throughout the years on philosophies of
youth athletics. There seems to be a constant tension between competition and complacency…
between the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat…
Basically I find that often as the church we find
ourselves buying into worldly ideas from both sides of the spectrum. You see in the world there are some that
compete with a win-at-any-cost attitude and then others that want everyone to
be happy and get a trophy (and never experience the agony of defeat.) We need
to be careful of either extreme…
Now I know that believers will, for the most part, agree
that the win-at-any-cost attitude is not God-honoring… yet go to any church
league or Christian school league and you will be reminded of how askew our
priorities are; go to any youth rec league and I bet you will have trouble
distinguishing who the parents are that are professing Christians. I believe
Christian athletes should be the hardest working, toughest competitors in
sports… doing all (word or deed) to the glory of God (Col. 3:17). The purpose
of a game involves attempting to outscore one’s opponent and win. There is
nothing wrong with competing; yet when competition causes one’s attitude as a
player or fan to be non-Christ-like then that one is in sin.
The other extreme is that of complacency and trying to
make sure that competition is removed so everyone can feel happy. The problem
is that is not real life! Life is full of setbacks and heartaches and part of
our job as parents, coaches, teachers, and ministers is trying to teach how to
handle those setbacks in a God-honoring way. (I don’t want to burst anyone’s
bubble but even when you don’t keep score, the kids still know who is talented
/ gifted in the competition and who is not. They even realize which team
probably scored the most even without a scoreboard…) When the “everyone’s a
winner / everyone gets a trophy” philosophy pops up, I want to throw up – it is
simply not true in sports or in life…
I just read a great blog article about this concept that
is so prevalent in our culture. The blogger, Matt Walsh, determines the two
outcomes of this philosophy. (See -http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/01/23/if-i-cant-accept-you-at-your-worst-then-maybe-you-should-stop-being-so-horrible/
- for a good read.)
First is the self-aware person that is embarrassed by
undeserved/unwarranted accolades (what he calls “pity trophies.”)
Second is the one that is not self-aware and is fooled by
these accolades and buys into the hype. Walsh’s description of them is very
accurate and evident in this world of entitlement: “They will look at those trophies and gold stars, unearned and
undeserved, and begin to develop an inflated image of themselves. What is born
from this is not confidence, but narcissism and arrogance. These are the kids
in possession of the much-heralded “self-esteem.” Indeed, they hold themselves
in high esteem. Why? Because they are themselves. They are spectacular,
beautiful, athletic, and brilliant, all by their very nature. Whatever they do
is the best thing anyone has ever done, simply because it was done by them.
Whoever comes in contact with them ought to be grateful for the privilege.
Success and happiness is what they are due, and the entire universe is in their
debt. They are the people who expect the Lord to descend from heaven
and hand them a game ball and a participation trophy every day.” He goes
on to say, “Shielded from failure, insulated from criticism, covered in
emotional bubble wrap, our kids are venturing out into the world with little
discipline and even less humility.”
I am sure I will
not win any father of the year awards but this past Saturday following my 3rd
grade daughter’s game I drew some uncomfortable laughter from those around me.
When she approached me I put my arm around her and said, “You played awful
today.” (Are you feeling uneasy about now?) But then I went on to say, “But isn’t
it great to know that my love for you is not based upon how well you play
basketball?” She played poorly and that created teachable moments – not opportunities
to flatter her (lie to her.) Proverbs 26:28 says that “a flattering mouth
works ruin.”
The
Christian message itself is based upon our inadequacies and shortcomings. It is
based upon our failure. It is based upon us losing self-esteem and realizing we
fall short (Romans 3:23; Ephesians 2:1). It is based upon two incredible
words found in Ephesians 2:4: “But God…” He loved us not based upon our
performance but in spite of our poor performance.
Sports
provide us a great teaching platform about God and about life…
