I've been praying for a miracle. It’s funny how often times, at least for myself, I forget to recognize miracles, unless they’re extravagant and obvious... Obvious in the sense that it’s the one I wanted, or the one that was most convenient. With everything that my fathers been through , the fact that he’s alive is a miracle. It’s a miracle that he is able to breathe on his own now. It’s a miracle that he is starting to move. It’s a miracle that he’s interacting. In my mind, they were all good things and absolutely blessings, but I still found myself wishing God would perform a miracle . A miracle to me, would have been that my dad was out of the hospital and out of his bed, or that they ran his tests, and he was miraculously healthier than before.
I once read a book called Disobedient God: Trusting a God Who Goes Off-Script by Albert Tate. The book talked about how to handle God when he is “disobedient” to our plans and our desires. The words from that book have been spiraling in my mind throughout these past three weeks. On page 120, Tate says “One of the greatest strategies that Satan will use to get you to lock into your doubt and never confess is the embarrassment and the fear of you being the only one.” So let me be far from the first to say, I want to fully trust God's will, but I still have an idea of what I think God’s will should be and when God’s will starts to look different to that, I find myself questioning His judgment. I sometimes think my plan would have been better. Deep down, I know all the right things to say, and do in these scenarios, but it’s hard to put into action when it involves someone you love, and you feel helpless. I know, with confidence, that this is all in God's hands and His will and His plan is better than mine, but I also know that if that will doesn’t look the way I had hoped it, I easily become disappointed. But I do not want to get myself in the habit of negating God’s powerful moments. Just because my dad is still fairly unresponsive, doesn’t change the fact that the amount of response he has given is still miraculous. It’s made me look hard at my life at how many times I think I don’t see God in a situation. In reality I don’t see the version of God that I wanted in that situation. For example, I recently was playing in the Mercedes Benz Stadium for Flag Football Nationals. I felt like I had worked hard to get there and was expecting to have more playing time. When I didn’t get much, I was pretty disappointed and confused and lost track of what an incredible opportunity I had just to be standing on the field and the blessing it was to play on it, even if it was for a short time. I have a bad habit, I want God to always make sense. Denying myself, denying control is one of the hardest things I have had to learn. I don’t know that it’s something anyone could ever perfect but it is worth aiming to achieve. The peace that comes with having your life in the hands of God who is on your side and loves you, someone you can trust no matter the outcome is worth pursuing. In the wise words of dad, found in the lullaby he wrote for us “Rest, be still, know that God is real, and He wants to take care of you”.
Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.
Job 5:8–11
As for me, I would seek God, and to God would commit my cause, who does great things and unsearchable, marvelous things without number: he gives rain on the earth and sends waters on the fields; he sets on high those who are lowly, and those who mourn are lifted to safety.
Psalm 9:1
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
Below are some songs that Christa felt tied in well with this devotion.
I once read a book called Disobedient God: Trusting a God Who Goes Off-Script by Albert Tate. The book talked about how to handle God when he is “disobedient” to our plans and our desires. The words from that book have been spiraling in my mind throughout these past three weeks. On page 120, Tate says “One of the greatest strategies that Satan will use to get you to lock into your doubt and never confess is the embarrassment and the fear of you being the only one.” So let me be far from the first to say, I want to fully trust God's will, but I still have an idea of what I think God’s will should be and when God’s will starts to look different to that, I find myself questioning His judgment. I sometimes think my plan would have been better. Deep down, I know all the right things to say, and do in these scenarios, but it’s hard to put into action when it involves someone you love, and you feel helpless. I know, with confidence, that this is all in God's hands and His will and His plan is better than mine, but I also know that if that will doesn’t look the way I had hoped it, I easily become disappointed. But I do not want to get myself in the habit of negating God’s powerful moments. Just because my dad is still fairly unresponsive, doesn’t change the fact that the amount of response he has given is still miraculous. It’s made me look hard at my life at how many times I think I don’t see God in a situation. In reality I don’t see the version of God that I wanted in that situation. For example, I recently was playing in the Mercedes Benz Stadium for Flag Football Nationals. I felt like I had worked hard to get there and was expecting to have more playing time. When I didn’t get much, I was pretty disappointed and confused and lost track of what an incredible opportunity I had just to be standing on the field and the blessing it was to play on it, even if it was for a short time. I have a bad habit, I want God to always make sense. Denying myself, denying control is one of the hardest things I have had to learn. I don’t know that it’s something anyone could ever perfect but it is worth aiming to achieve. The peace that comes with having your life in the hands of God who is on your side and loves you, someone you can trust no matter the outcome is worth pursuing. In the wise words of dad, found in the lullaby he wrote for us “Rest, be still, know that God is real, and He wants to take care of you”.
Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.
Job 5:8–11
As for me, I would seek God, and to God would commit my cause, who does great things and unsearchable, marvelous things without number: he gives rain on the earth and sends waters on the fields; he sets on high those who are lowly, and those who mourn are lifted to safety.
Psalm 9:1
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
Below are some songs that Christa felt tied in well with this devotion.
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